Movie
‘Abigail’: Bite Me Harder Tiny Dancer
A gang of misfit kidnappers find their tiny target far more bloodthirsty than they bargained for!
So, unfortunately, the trailers gave it away and let’s be real that’s why most of us are here, the knowledge that the kidnap victim Abigail (Alisha Weir), codenamed by the would-be kidnappers appropriately as ‘tiny dancer’, is in fact, a vampire. Not a spoiler, point of fact, one of the film’s actual great selling points. And the reactions from the misfit club when faced with a real actual f*cking vampire, range hilariously from the blunt “no such thing as vampires” all the way to, “Are we talking True Blood or Twilight rules or what?” all while covered in buckets and buckets of blood.
Anyway, the gang manages to subdue and abscond with the aforementioned Abigail, in a pre-prepared duffle bag, like you do, and converge to a new location, a house oddly similar to the one she was just taken from. Welcomed and given codenames by a man who introduces himself as Lambert (Giancarlo Esposito), our misfit club is told to simply hold down the fort in this strange old house with the girl chained up in a room and one person to attend her, for twenty-four hours, and they’ll all get paid.
As inevitable as the tides, the dopey druggie Dean (Angus Cloud) is the first to die, and we’re going to give that death-style points for inspiring terror right off the bat. The very controlling Frank (Dan Stevens, holy crap yes that is the guy from FXs Legion) is also of course the most suspicious – of everyone around him, sure, but also he himself is totes sus. We don’t learn terribly much about the musclebound tank who gets dubbed Peter (Kevin Durand), he’s your pretty typical little-brains-heart-of-gold muscle-for-hire any proper gang needs, right down to the bottle problem. Sammy (Kathryn Newton), well, even for being a purported hacker-type, she has, like, reality issues. Rickles (William Catlett), he’s arguably the most dangerous among them, ex-military and yet somehow here and involved in kidnapping for a few mills. Joey (Melissa Barrera) is our Final Girl, and though she has the inevitable problems in her recent past, she seems more capable of doing the hard thing and still somehow empathizing at the end of the day. Must be her burning desire to get back with her son.
The fit hits the shan pretty quickly, and Abigail morphs from tiny dancer to tiny monster, though honestly, the way Abigail spoke the entire time in the film, if the ‘nappers had been paying close enough attention, would have been a solid clue. The performance from Alisha Weir as Abigail is incredible, as she literally dances a fine line between comedy, tragedy, and outright monstrosity. With a face full of makeup and the force of a tiny tornado to back it up, Weir brings to mind the great performances of the vampires in 30 Days of Night who saw the practicality in the need to trap their food, but also, play with it a bit first before feasting! Anything else would give away the absolute fun time that is Abigail, so you should go see it, out in theaters now!
Movie
‘Mufasa: The Lion King’ Will Leave You Breathless
“Mufasa: The Lion King” is a visually stunning addition to the beloved Lion King franchise, offering a fresh and emotionally resonant take on the origins of one of Disney’s most iconic characters. The film beautifully explores Mufasa’s journey, balancing heartfelt moments with touches of comedy that lighten the mood and make the story accessible to audiences of all ages. The animation is breathtaking, capturing the vibrant landscapes and lush environments of the Pride Lands, adding depth to Mufasa’s character and his relationships.
The storytelling is compelling, effectively pulling at the heartstrings while providing insights into Mufasa’s character before he becomes the legendary king. However, the setup for Scar’s betrayal feels somewhat underdeveloped, lacking the deeper motivation that could have enriched their complex brotherly relationship. This missed opportunity leaves a slight gap in understanding Scar’s actions, which could have elevated the dramatic stakes.
The musical score is impressive, featuring memorable songs that enhance the emotional impact of pivotal scenes. While there are several standout tracks, one song, in particular, resonates deeply and is sure to linger in viewers’ minds long after the credits roll. Overall, “Mufasa: The Lion King” is an amazing film and a worthy addition to the Lion King lore that manages to deliver both laughter and tears, offering a rich tapestry of storytelling that fans will appreciate.
Movie
Is ‘Kraven the Hunter’ a Total Letdown?
“Kraven the Hunter,” directed by J.C. Chandor, aims to introduce a beloved Spider-Man villain to the big screen, but unfortunately, it falls short of expectations. The film suffers from noticeable issues, notably an overuse of ADR (Automated Dialogue Replacement), which detracts from the authenticity of the characters’ interactions and contributes to an uneven audio experience. This technical flaw is compounded by rough storytelling that feels disjointed and lacking in coherence, leaving viewers struggling to connect with the narrative.
Aaron Taylor-Johnson delivers a commendable performance as Kraven, showcasing the character’s gritty nature and complex motivations. His portrayal has potential, and it’s evident that he could elevate the character far beyond what is presented with a stronger script and direction. However, the absence of Spider-Man, a central figure in Kraven’s lore, leaves a void that the film struggles to fill. Without this critical connection, the plot meanders and fails to create the tension or stakes that fans of the superhero genre crave.
Additionally, including Rhino as a villain feels like a missed opportunity; he is presented more as a gag character with limited screen time, undermining any sense of threat or depth. For the average moviegoer, “Kraven the Hunter” might entertain but ultimately feels like a mediocre viewing experience. Comic book fans, however, may find disappointment in this lackluster attempt to create a solo character film. Instead of an exhilarating dive into Kraven’s world, the film presents a watered-down version, leaving audiences wishing for a more cohesive vision that honors its comic book roots.
Movie
A Brief Review and History of A Year Without a Santa Claus
A Year Without a Santa Claus, the 1974 stop-motion holiday classic produced by Rankin/Bass, is a heartwarming and whimsical tale that has cemented its place in holiday traditions. Based on Phyllis McGinley’s 1956 book, the story revolves around a disheartened Santa Claus who, feeling unappreciated, decides to take a year off from his Christmas duties. It’s up to Mrs. Claus and a pair of well-meaning elves, Jingle and Jangle, to reignite the Christmas spirit and show Santa the world’s unwavering belief in him.
The movie is beloved for its unforgettable characters, especially the bickering Miser Brothers, Snow Miser and Heat Miser. Their catchy, vaudeville-style musical numbers, “Snow Miser Song” and “Heat Miser Song”, are so iconic they’ve become cultural touchstones, often parodied and celebrated decades later.
Directed by Arthur Rankin Jr. and Jules Bass, the film continues the duo’s tradition of stop-motion magic, blending heartfelt storytelling with quirky humor. The voice cast, featuring Mickey Rooney as Santa and Shirley Booth as Mrs. Claus, delivers standout performances. Booth’s warm narration was her final acting role before retirement, adding a layer of poignancy to the film.
Initially released on December 10, 1974, on ABC, the special didn’t immediately achieve the legendary status of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. However, it gained a dedicated following through annual holiday airings, nostalgic appeal, and its distinct charm.
The film’s themes of hope, unity, and rekindling joy remain timeless, making it a perennial favorite for audiences of all ages. Its blend of humor, catchy songs, and a touching message about believing in magic and goodwill ensures its enduring legacy during the holiday season.
For fans of holiday classics, A Year Without a Santa Claus is a must-watch that never fails to warm hearts and spread cheer.