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‘Hellraiser Judgment’: Meet the Stygian Inquisition

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SPOILERS AHEAD! In the beginning, we’re immediately treated to a glorious golden shot of the Box, also known as Lemarchand’s Puzzle Box, and even more fun, the Lamentation Configuration, being handled by Pinhead himself as he talks with the Auditor about the need for modernizing their works on humankind. Right after that, we’re whisked off to a man who clearly has issues, being invited by a mysterious and commiserating benefactor to a place of understanding and reward; a clear demonstration of the films platform and intentions.

Inside this dead house, the Auditor (Gary J. Tunicliffe) makes a record of the sinners, well, sins, gives them to the Assessor (John Gulager) who, yes, literally eats the pages salted with the tears of children, and then freaking regurgitates the mass to the three naked ladies who comprise the psychic Jury, to render their final judgment on said sinner. All of this is done with complacent malice, so much blood and gore and thick drooling mucus, the wet slap and crunch of prehensile chains we all recall from the original films. Like discovering the Box lost in your attic next to the corpse of a dead rat who tried to pry it open, there is no escaping the honest desires of your own heart, even when it leads to your downfall.

Before we can go any further, it has to be said that these new characters introduced – the Auditor and his antiquated typewriter, the Assessor and his vomit, the Jury ladies and their Bathory bath, even the Butcher (Joel Decker) and the Surgeon (Jillyan Blundell) – are not Cenobites or even part of the Order of the Gash, to which Pinhead belongs and rules with a bloody fist. Rather, these guys and fetish dolls are known as the Stygian Inquisition, and are another Order of Hell, just like the Gash. Sadly, none of this is mentioned in the film, so mistaking every last cut-up figurine for yet another Cenobite is perfectly understandable.

Also making a surprise appearance, is an actual honest-to-whomever Angel, known as Jophiel (Helena Grace Donald). She appears in white leathers and blinding bright light, to actually trade insults and orders with the master of pain himself, Pinhead, for the delicate matter of the disposition of a soul. Another bold risk for director Tunicliffe, for never before in the entire Hellraiser film mythology, have Angels been introduced before. Demons aplenty everywhere, sure, but never actual Angels.

But we’re getting ahead of ourselves! A dog-loving socialite named Crystal Lanning (Grace Montie) has been rather brutally killed, yet another in a string of ritualistic murders from the serial killer who calls himself the Preceptor. This self-proclaimed purifier has been performing ‘Seven’-style sin cleansing murders and the cop duo of the Carter brothers Sean (Damon Carney) and David (Randy Wayne), plus an unwanted tagalong in the form of Detective Christine Egerton (Alexandra Harris), have been assigned to the case.

The detective investigation into these ritual murders is kind of lame, plays out very similar to other direct-to-video Hellraiser sequels I could name, and is basically a foil to get one of the Carter brothers to that dead house where the Auditor does his nasty job. Which is fine, I guess, but it was rather superfluous and uninspired for this kind of plot hole to be used. Then again, we didn’t necessarily come to the dead house where Pinhead and the Auditor and his cohorts judge sinners for silly things like plot.

Or did we? The plot of the Preceptor and his works here on Earth aside, there is an amazing dynamic that goes on inside the dead house, not between the Preceptor or the Stygian Inquisition, no, it’s between Pinhead and Jophiel, over which side gets the Preceptors soul. I’m reminded of the reality of Angels from films like ‘Prophecy’, who carefully explain that dealing with actual Angels, those psycho m-f-ers who are the literal embodiment of Gods will here on Earth, is a much more terrifying prospect than most people think. So how did Jophiel get to the dead house, where she attempts to set herself against Pinhead in the matter of the disposition of the Preceptor’s soul?

Imagine, Angels acting on the orders of the side they represent, sent to the dead house to claim the Preceptors soul before it can be sent to the Orders of Hell, because despite everything he’s done to other humans, the purported “Good Side” thinks his works need to continue. Gives potential to see Pinhead, the Cenobites, the Stygian Inquisition and all the Orders of Hell in an entirely new way, not being the only bad guys in the room anymore.

The visual tone of the movie is done quite well, harkening back to the original two Clive Barker-led Hellraiser films, but more washed out and crumbling, like the nightmare sun-faded world of the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre movie. Even the never-ending blood and gore isn’t as stark-staring as the original films, but rather deepened and faded at the same time, indicating the march of time and a clear aversion to anything clean.

All the special effects and makeup tricks are used to a clear purpose in Judgment, and what CGI there is, is barely noticeable as an afterthought (which I prefer, ‘cuz practical effects rule). The mythology of the Box, of the Order of the Gash and Pinhead and his Cenobites, have all been pretty well established already, so writing a story already in the set-world and taking a seriously different turn with it was very likely a good choice on the directors part.

Though the storylines do get a little muddled and there wasn’t enough of the cop parts to keep me interested in that, the dead house and the Stygian Inquisition is fascinating, and the new dynamic of Pinhead versus other Orders and even Angels is amazing. And yes, I recognized Heather Langencamp in her tiny role as the landlady of an apartment the Carter boys check; doesn’t make much never-mind to me.

Finally, we will address the hook-headed elephant in the room, that is, the newest actor Paul T. Taylor taking the iconic role of Pinhead. Certainly it’s a vast improvement over the previous actor to play him, Stephen Smith Collins, but then that poor guy trying to play Pinhead when faced with that atrocity of a Hellraiser knockoff never stood a chance anyways.

Conversely, Taylor brings back a sense of majesty back to the character of Pinhead, a steadfast calmness that reminds me of the way Barker described the Hell Priest in his last Hellraiser novel, The Scarlet Gospels, and I am all for that. The iconic makeup of the nails in the head is more or less the same, but the hollows in Taylors eye-sockets and the different and updated look of his vestments, plus a somber and yet macabre voice all his own, make for a pleasing new version of Pinhead all around.

Remember folks, that in Hell those iconic nails in the head is actually a badge of office, as in leader of the Order of the Gash, that sort of thing, so literally anyone can wear them and be known as Pinhead. For you Cenobite trivia buffs out there, at one point the pins were even worn by Kirsty Cotton herself, in the Hellraiser comic books from BOOM! Studios. Doug Bradley did make the iconic original version of Pinhead his own for many long years and increasingly-bad movies, but anyone can become the avatar of Pinhead in Barker’s world, and somehow Paul T. Taylor managed it damn nicely.

One can easily see why Tunnecliffe named his magnum opus Hellraiser Judgment, but to truly call yourself a fan of the world, see the movie and judge for yourself. I’m willing to wager you die-hard Cenobite fans out there won’t be disappointed!

 

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Anime Review: A Certain Scientific Railgun

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Rating: 9/10

A Certain Scientific Railgun is an electrifying anime that mixes superpowers with science fiction in a city brimming with secrets. It’s part of the Toaru (A Certain) franchise, which also includes A Certain Magical Index, but it stands out by focusing on the everyday lives, struggles, and mysteries surrounding some of Academy City’s most intriguing characters. Railgun captures the blend of friendship, science, and action, wrapped in a plot filled with suspense and heartfelt moments.

The story revolves around Mikoto Misaka, a powerful “Level 5” esper known as “Railgun” for her ability to shoot electricity like a railgun. Set in Academy City, a futuristic place dedicated to advancing human potential, the series follows Misaka and her friends—Kuroko Shirai, a teleporting “Judgment” officer; Ruiko Saten, a Level 0 with no esper abilities; and Kazari Uiharu, a cheerful tech enthusiast. The story flows between slice-of-life moments and intense action arcs, especially as Misaka digs deeper into Academy City’s dark side.

Each season introduces distinct plot arcs, like the “Level Upper” arc, where a mysterious device temporarily boosts students’ powers with dangerous side effects, and the “Sisters” arc, which reveals a shocking experiment involving Misaka’s DNA and a massive cloning project. The story is well-paced, taking viewers from lighter episodes that build relationships and humor to episodes packed with suspense and powerful emotional twists.

The animation by J.C. Staff is fantastic. Academy City feels vibrant and alive, with futuristic buildings, labs, and tech that set a high standard for a sci-fi city. The fight scenes are beautifully animated, especially when Misaka uses her electricity powers, creating brilliant sparks and electric blue streaks that are visually stunning. The art style balances the serious with a light, polished touch, keeping the show visually appealing across action-packed and everyday scenes alike.

The heart of Railgun is its cast. Mikoto Misaka is a strong, complex protagonist who’s both a powerful esper and a kind, sometimes awkward teenager. Her determination to protect others, combined with her own vulnerability, makes her a compelling character. Kuroko adds humor and loyalty as her supportive friend and partner, often lightening tense moments. Saten and Uiharu, while less powerful, bring warmth and relatability, especially as they grapple with what it means to be “Level 0” in a society that values power.

One of the most memorable aspects of Railgun is how it balances power dynamics and character development. Unlike many shows focused solely on high-powered heroes, Railgun values its entire cast, showing how even ordinary people play vital roles in challenging corruption and protecting the city.

A Certain Scientific Railgun dives into themes of friendship, power, and ethics, especially the moral cost of scientific advancement. The series raises questions about the value of one’s abilities versus character, and how people handle failure or the absence of power. Misaka’s personal journey, especially in the Sisters arc, highlights the responsibilities that come with power, as she learns her DNA was used to create clones exploited for a deadly experiment. This arc adds emotional weight to the series, as Misaka battles guilt, anger, and a desire to right the wrongs done in her name.

The soundtrack in Railgun is energetic and fitting, enhancing the tone of every scene, whether it’s a high-stakes battle or a quiet moment among friends. The opening themes, especially “Only My Railgun” by fripSide, are iconic and perfectly capture Misaka’s fierce, independent spirit. The background music subtly enhances each scene, adding a layer of suspense, excitement, or warmth as needed.

Final Thoughts: A Certain Scientific Railgun is a must-watch for fans of science fiction and action anime with strong character development. It manages to deliver both powerful story arcs and entertaining slice-of-life moments, giving viewers a sense of attachment to Academy City and its residents. The storylines are not only thrilling but thought-provoking, making you question the impact of scientific progress on human lives.

While it helps to know a bit about the Toaru universe, Railgun stands on its own with an engaging story and cast that will appeal to newcomers and seasoned fans alike. With thrilling fights, heartwarming friendships, and an electrifying main character, A Certain Scientific Railgun is a standout in the genre. If you’re looking for a series that’s equal parts action, heart, and intrigue, this is it.

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Sweetpea

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Sweetpea is a new dark comedy series created by Kristie Swain and adapted from a novel series by CJ Skuse. The series stars the ethereal goddess that is Ella Purnell (Fallout, Yellowjackets) using her actual English accent! 

Purnell plays a young woman whose name is not actually Sweetpea, though she is very much a wallflower. Though even Wallflower might have too much gravitas, Rhiannon (Purnell) is treated by those around her like a weed. She is stepped on and ignored by everyone except her dad and pet chihuahua. Many have argued that Purnell is just ‘too pretty’ to be that abjectly ignored by everyone. However, Purnell is an amazing actress who plays the washed-out, doe-eyed, shrinking ‘sweetpea’ so convincingly. 

Rhiannon was bullied heavily in school which led to her developing trichotillomania (a hair-pulling disorder) which ultimately caused bald patches on her scalp. She still keeps an unconvincing brunette wig in a drawer in her bedroom. Rhiannon’s dad is constantly encouraging Rhiannon to stand up for herself. Unfortunately (light spoiler!) Rhiannon’s Dad dies from his illness in the first episode, leaving her alone in the world. 

Rhiannon returns home to the large empty house she once shared with her dad. After yet another tragic incident Rhiannon looks at her life, her thirst for revenge is obvious. Particularly against her main school bully Julia Blenkingsopp (Nicôle Lecky).

Rhiannon sees Julia as having a perfect life and didn’t peak in high school “like bullies are supposed to do!”. When Rhiannon returned to work as an admin assistant for a local paper, not only did none of her colleagues notice her absence but they didn’t acknowledge her return. The only person who appears to talk to her is her boss Norman played by Jeremy Swift (Ted Lasso) who condescendingly calls her “sweetpea” and demands tea. 

Rhiannon’s mental state declines enough for her to finally confront Julia in a club. Julia and her friends laugh at Rhiannon which brings memories of school back and anxiously tugging at her hair. This leads Rhiannon to commit a horrifying yet liberating crime when leaving the club leading to a whole new way of expressing herself.

What I Liked:

I enjoyed watching Rhiannon’s confidence grow throughout the series. Purnell herself spoke about the production of subtlety added makeup to subconsciously influence the change in her. Rhiannon transformed from a shrinking girl to a hip-swaying, go-getting career woman. Yet its clear there is a lot of mental turmoil within Rhiannon. Purnell (2024) jokes that she actually “got kinda jacked”  due to the tension she held in her body whilst suppressing Rhiannon’s rage. Purnell also comments on how freeing it was to let it all out which Rhiannon does many times and is just as satisfying for the audience!

Initially, I found every character rather one-dimensional and stale compared to Purnell. However, as the show progresses most characters become multifaceted, particularly Julia. The narrative of the show really makes you question your own morals and sense of justice. You find yourself making excuses for Rhiannon and almost cheering her on when you really, really shouldn’t.

I also enjoyed how the show explores the victim complex. Is Rhiannon really a victim or has she taken on this mantle and lived her life accordingly? Sweetpea expertly plays with the shades of grey in the ideas of what makes someone a bully and what makes someone a victim. 

Sweetpea fits in perfectly in the genre of British black comedy. Scenes like when Rhiannon is clearing out her chest freezer and then climbs in herself to see if it could potentially fit a body. The door of the freezer almost closes on her but she catches it just in time. This scene perfectly captures just what kind of character Rhiannon is.

I also liked how the character’s houses were used as metaphors for their lives. The home Rhiannon shared with her father is messy and cozy yet in desperate need of TLC and repair much like Rhiannon herself. You can tell it’s a well-loved home with a long history much like Rhiannon and her father’s relationship. In stark contrast to Julia’s fiercely stylish and minimalistic home which she shares with her fiancé. It’s sleek and modern yet ultimately empty with little sign of love. 

The opening credits and music choices are also fire.

What Could Be Improved:

Like many others, I didn’t quite believe someone as beautiful as Purnell would be completely ignored by the general public. It did look at times like they were relying on drab clothing and too light foundation to make her look mousey. However, as stated, Purnell’s performance does save it.

The main ‘love triangle’ (if could even call it that) was a bit forced. Calam Lynch’s portrayal of Rhiannon’s colleague ‘AJ’ was a bit too enamored with Rhiannon with no real build-up. However, I found myself really enjoying Jon Pointing’s portrayal of ‘Craig’ and wishing his arc had been explored more. 

I really wanted the show to lean more into the exploration of ‘abuser’ and the ‘abused’ and take it to a deeper level. Maybe in series 2?

All in all, I enjoyed this traverse through Sweetpea’s world. I am interested to see where they go with it in the future.

Three and a half stars.

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Is This the Scariest Movie Ever?

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It’s been called the scariest movie ever. Or the grimmest, bleakest, and most brutal. The post-apocalyptic drama; Threads, has only been aired three times, its premiere in 1984 (appropriate year), 1985, and 2024 for its 40th anniversary. Threads has also been made available on streaming services. The anniversary has stirred up memories from its initial release which has been dubbed ‘the night Britain did not sleep!’

Threads is a BBC-produced TV movie which explores what would happen if a nuclear bomb was dropped on the English city of Sheffield.

The film is structured like a documentary; with a voiceover speaking to the audience in a clipped, received pronunciation BBC English. The narrator speaks over what is possibly stock footage of a spider weaving its web, or its threads. The narrator explains how in urban society everything connects and how we all rely on one another’s skills to survive. Ominously the narrator points out how fragile these threads are.

THREAD 1 – FAMILY

The film then cuts to our two leads Ruth (Karen Meagher) and Jimmy (Reece Dinsdale). These two young lovebirds are in a car over looking the Sheffield countryside. A fighter jet flies overhead as Ruth remarks how “peaceful” it is. We follow Ruth Beckett and Jimmy Kemp as they navigate an unplanned pregnancy.

The film plays like a ‘kitchen sink drama’. I have heard ‘kitchen sink’ described as an ‘anti-Hollywood’ where everyone has their natural teeth and skin texture. The film looks similar to a British soap opera. 

Whilst the narrative at this point just skirts around somewhat boring, it is clear something is playing out globally in the background. We see it on newspaper covers and hear snippets on radios and TVs. There is a situation unfolding in the Middle East with tensions building between the Soviets and the USA. Troops are mobilized and more importantly, nuclear warheads are moved. 

And then it happens.

THREAD 2- SECURITY

At almost 50 minutes in, the bomb finally drops. The literal bomb that is. The omnipresent narrator tells us it is 8.30 am in the UK meaning it is 3.30 am in Washington DC; Western response will be at its slowest. 

The bomb scene is incredibly powerful. This is where the ‘kitchen sink’ realism really comes into its own. It looks like any other British high street but people are running around screaming looking for shelter amidst the blaring siren. Children are being scooped up from their prams and the panic is palpable. Infamously one businesswoman is staring up at the blooming mushroom cloud rising above the city, the camera pans to see urine running down her trouser leg and pooling at her 80’s white heels.

There is constant screaming as buildings explode, windows smash, and curtains catch fire.

Text informs us that 210 megatons in total fell on the UK with an estimated 2.5 – 9 million casualties.

THREAD 3 – SOCIETY

Ruth exits her parents’ destroyed house to look for Jimmy. In her old neighborhood she is greeted by a horrendous sight. The whole street looks like that of The Blitz; with dead pets and both parents and children looking for each other. A shell-shocked woman covered in ash asks Ruth; “have you seen our Mandy?” she is proffering what looks to be a child’s coat, as if Mandy forgot her coat when going outside to play. A charred corpse with perfect white intact teeth (probably dentures) is embedded into a building. A staring woman is clutching the burnt remains of her infant.

After this, the horrific scenes come thick and fast. 

Food has become the new currency and food stores are protected by force. It is here we see the figure who has haunted many viewers nightmares. The armed traffic warden with the bandaged face. Played by an extra who actually was a traffic warden in real life!

Hospitals are overrun with the injured. The harried staff are using sheets as bandages and table salt to disinfect contaminated water. Doctors resorting to amputation with no anesthetic. 

THREAD 4 – CHILDREN

Ruth gives birth to a healthy child. A little girl named Jane. Ruth gives birth alone in a barn and has to bite through the umbilical cord. Later, on Christmas Day no less, a group of survivors gathers around a fire in the barn looking like a macabre nativity scene.

 But what sort of world has Ruth brought her daughter into? We are told it is ten years later and society has returned to medieval times with the nuclear winter and UV damage affecting the crops. Jane does not call Ruth ‘mum’ only ‘Ruth’ and has no reaction when Ruth finally dies. Are the people in this society so profoundly broken by the sheer amount of loss and trauma that they can no longer form familial bonds? Has that thread been cut? 

There is clearly little regard for human life anymore. Jane walks past three corpses hanging in the foreground paying them no attention. Is this a mass suicide or an execution? The corpses are also bare. Have people stolen their clothes to protect themselves from the harsh nuclear winter? Images such as these, shown for mere seconds can tell you so much about the situation. 

THREAD 5 – LANGUAGE

In the second half of the film, there is barely any dialogue. Any words spoken by Jane and her peers are some strange form of pidgin English. Many fans have argued that language would not degrade that quickly. However, these children have been brought up by deeply traumatized parents (if they had parents at all). People barely speak anymore and death and disease are extremely common. Is it any surprise that mankind has been brought down to its most basic level? Or is this the cognitive effects of growing up around high levels of radiation? 

Many fans comment how Threads gives no hope. But there appears to be a rudimentary school system-cum-workhouse with Jane and her peers watching an old educational video. Although the last scene definitely takes away from the tepid hope we are shown.

SO IS IT SCARY?

Well….as I had heard about the film through cultural osmosis I knew what to expect. I appreciate that during the 80’s, living in the fog of the Cold War, a nuclear holocaust was looking more and more likely. Having a film at that time showing exactly what it would look like if it were to happen in a typical British city would be horrifying. 

With the film being set up as a documentary speaking to some unknown in the future, it is interesting when you are watching from the future. Before COVID I would think it was so unrealistic; the way a lot of people didn’t take the crisis seriously until they were practically underneath the bomb. Now I know differently. Everything is fine until it’s not and we don’t tend to tackle a crisis until it is right on our doorstep. Like Mr Kemp with his trousers down on the loo as the bomb went off, we are so ill-prepared. And all the systems (or threads) in place that you thought would protect you, such as the government, are just ill-equipped.

It is an extremely well-done film especially when I learned the budget was £400,000 (about 1.2 million today). The acting is superb and I can see why it’s such an iconic film. In today’s current climate Threads is more relevant than ever. Would highly recommend it.

Five Stars.

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